My name is Gilbert.
i'm not someone happy
i feel so sad nowadays, life seems so empty and meaningless, i know it isn't, but i can't find the reason to continue this life, its like..... just empty, i feel like i've lost my friends, even though i know they are in camp, i feel like no one wants to talk to me, but that could just be my own misconception, i feel like army now is really meaningless, i dun get to really learn anything interesting, one of my precious fren told me that its not that i dun get to learn anything, i'm just not positive enough to look forward and learn. i believe he is true, but i'm really missing something, and its where i don't wish to move forward from. its my combat engineer life.
the instructors that really showed concern for us, sergeant wang already left for australia, and the chances of seeing them again is really low, some have ord, some are about to ord. i really enjoyed the times we were joking with each other and the words of encouragement when we were going through tough times. these are the small things that i could never really forget.
then there are the 1st and 3rd guards people, the 3rd and 4th sir people, we were once engineers, but now we're so divided, and separated, its like a distance is growing between us, the ones i were so close to in the past, have gone on to a more interesting life ahead, conversations have begun to get off topic a little, i dun want it to be like that.....
my precious section, when i look back at it, i wasn't really proactive while in bunk, i would always run to other sections to find fun, and neglect the other 9 who are in the bunk.
its been so long since i wrote something, but i dun regret, the times i spent outside, doing my engineer stuff, is exciting!